There's a slight smile on Judy's face as she falls deeper into her dream. The landscape and the sky are extra beautiful in this dream. Everything looks and feels so real. She opens the plaid blanket in the field of daisies and sits on it. She feels peace and safety in her life. But dreams have a way of going array real fast. This beautiful dream is about to turn into a horrible nightmare. As she's looking up into the sky it slowly turns into a blood red haze. Then black thunderclouds roll in. An evil silence falls on the land. A fog comes up from the ground and lightning and thunder barks from the sky. The rain starts to drop down. Judy slowly gets to her feet. She starts to shake in utter fear. She can hear them coming now in the distance. She knows what they are and what they want. Judy turns and runs through the field and into the woods. There's a light ahead in the distance and she runs toward it. With all her might she races through the thicket, rain and fog. But they have caught up to her way to fast in the rain soaked darkness. Death is on her heels.
She can smell them now, they are right behind her. The hands of death reach out and grab her by the neck and slam her into the moist ground. Her face is shoved into the earth. She can not breathe now and she fights for her life. They push her deeper and deeper into the ground with their lifeless hands. Judy tries to push back up, but they push her closer and closer to hell. She fights harder and rolls to the left and to the right to get out of their grip. The hands of death let go and she falls into the black darkness.
Judy is startled awake right before she slams to the hospital floor. She braces herself and hits the tile floor. She has fallen out of the hospital bed. Judy lands on her left side and the pain shots up and down her left arm. She rolls onto her stomach and takes the weight off of her arm. Judy's heart is racing as she looks around the room. There's some light coming in from the window. The moon is bright on this cold winter evening. She looks out the window and sees the snow slightly coming down. The cold tile floor is already trying to numb her hands and feet. Judy is forty-seven and has bone marrow cancer. Her hair is all but gone. The chemo treatments have knocked the life out of her. She feels like she's in her eighties as she lies on the cold floor. With effort Judy rolls over on to her back and reaches over and grabs the side of the bed. She tries to pull herself up back into bed, but there is no power in her arms. She collapses back onto the floor. Her breathing is heavy after one try. Judy starts to shake and the tears swell in her eyes as she tries again. But her effort this time is even worse than the first time. She falls to her back and weeps in the moonlight room.
Her eyes are adjusted to the dark room now. Judy can see the big clock
on the wall and can barely read the time, its 11:11. The nurse came in
at 10:00 something and gave her some pain pills and said good night. Judy
hopes the nurses check up on the patients during the night. Then she remembers
the buzzer for the nurses. She knows it's on the right hand side of the
bed, the side she fell out on. Judy grabs at the side of the bed and pulls
up with all her might. This time she makes it farther. She shakes uncontrollably
as her hand reaches over the top of the bed. Judy slaps at the covers
and feels everywhere, but can not find the buzzer. She falls again to
the cold tile floor. Her chest rises up and down from the effort. After
a few minutes she tries again, but feels nothing and falls to the floor.
Judy wipes the sweat from her forehead. Without knowing it she had just
missed the buzzer by inches. Judy gives up on the thought of getting back
into bed or finding the buzzer. She looks back behind her at the door
that leads to the hallway. The door is only fifteen feet away. But in
the dark it looks like forty feet away. She must get to the door. Judy
rolls and lies on her stomach. That was too easy, it felt like someone
lifted her and rolled her over. She frantically looks around in the darkness.
But she is the only one in the room.
Judy wipes the tears from her eyes as her mind races with more thoughts
of her past. She smiles to herself as she thinks of her favorite sandwich
when she was growing up. Two pieces of bread with mayonnaise piled in
between them. Then she remembers the love of her life. The smile slowly
fades as she looks into the darkness. Just two years out of high school
she meets Joel. When the two met it's like the old story of the young
couple falling in love at first sight. Before one years up the two are
married and starting a family. In four years they have three children,
Kathy, Wayne and Lisa. Judy is going to a memory she has been running
from for twenty-three years. She embraces the cold floor as she thinks
about that December Night in 1964.
Judy rests and looks at the light under the door that leads to the hallway.
If she can just get to the door and open it, then yell for a nurse. Slowly
she claws at the floor and tries to push with her feet. She stops after
what feels like five minutes. She looks at her progress and sadness grips
at her heart, she has only moved a couple of inches. Her breathing is
real heavy now and her strength is almost empty. Panic sets in and Judy
tries to yell for help.
The memories flow through her mind and Judy thinks of the man that came
into her room four days ago. She was not expecting any visitors on that
day at the hospital. So Judy was surprised when the man in the long winter
coat walked into her room caring a bible. He closed the door and turned
and smiles at Judy.
In the shadows of the room He stands and watches Judy. The scares on
his hands are visible even in the darkness. He is from the beginning and
will always be. He sits at the right hand of God, his father. He is the
light in the darkness. For him all was created,
Her eyes open slowly, somehow Judy fell asleep on the cold floor. She
tries to look at the big clock on the wall then gives up. Everything is
blurry and disoriented. And the pain is shooting all over her body. A
chill runs up and down her spin, is she going to die on this hospital
floor? Where is she going when she does pass away? What is stopping her
from reaching out to Jesus? She is so afraid of dying. All these question
race back and forth in her mind. Then the dream crashes back into her
memories. The dream she was having when she fell out of bed. Dreams are
only dreams, but why does this dream feel like there's a truth and a reality
behind it. In her mind she can see the hands of death reaching out and
grabbing hold of her. They were pushing her down to where they come from,
hell. Fear engulfs Judy like a dark shadow. With no strength left Judy
pulls and kicks at the floor. She must make her way to the door. For what
seems like an eternity Judy fights to the door. She stops and collapses
her head on the floor again. And like before her effort has moved her
only inches. The tears fall from her eyes again as all hope is fading
away. Despair, loneliness and fear take Judy to the edge. Without hardly
any voice left she cries out for help again. "Somebody please help
me!! Please help me!"
The pin is pulled and the flood gates swing wide-open. The walls of sin and hatred that covered Judy's heart now tumble to the ground. Her human pride collapses as she reaches out to Jesus. The peace that she felt in the room now starts to fill her heart. Judy has never known this kind of love. The fear and the pain that Judy has felt most of her life, now turns to overflowing hope and joy. She feels the Holy Spirit of God come into her heart and wash her whole. The void Judy has felt in her life is gone. She knows Jesus has filled that void with His love. The tears of salvation fall from Judy's eyes and she makes no effort to wipe them away. The nightmare has no meaning now, and the fear of the unknown is gone. Death has no grip on her now. Judy hugs the floor now and knows she will be with her Jesus soon.
Nurse Stacy Lumberg stands at the nurses' station and looks over some
paperwork. Working on the cancer floor has opened her eyes to the world.
The job has brought her closer to God and her family. She tries to live
each day as her last. Stacy has seen how death comes and goes. How many
times has she seen the heart rate monitor go to a flat line. How many
times has she become close to a patient. She knows better, but love has
compassion, not cold shoulders. Now Stacy comes to Judy's paperwork and
smiles. The forty-seven year old lady has touched her heart. Stacy looks
at the clock on the wall. It's 3:16 am and something is telling her heart
to checkup on the patients. She checks on Mr. Lemay and all is good, then
checks on Mrs. Simon and she is sleeping.
Three days later the heart rate monitor slowly beeps and then goes flat line. Judy dies in her hospital bed holding her new bible. It's on a day her family was not there yet. And it was nurse Stacy's day off. But Judy did not die alone that day in the hospital. That day she died in the loving arms of Jesus.
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